My daughter has been found. Praise God! But honestly it hurts so much because she’s not home with me, she’s in jail. You know I actually just began to write about our family’s battle with drug addicted children. I am not even sure why I choose to open up now…..but I have. I think I truly try to find answers to questions that just don’t have them. Like why did my son and daughter start? Why won’t they quite? Do they know how much we love them? I am just having such a hard ti…me knowing that drugs has stolen my children right out of my hands. It has been about six or seven years we have been fighting this battle ……and each time gets harder and harder. They get clean and we I think this is it they are gonna make it, just keep loving and helping them they will get through…….however, I know after seven years that they have to want to be clean as much as we want them clean. At first when I found out I was in denial….thinking ground them, take their phone, take other privileges away and they will quit. But…….our nightmare through their battle has just begun. And I honestly see no end in sight. I hold on to my Lords hand thinking a miracle is on the way…….and I do believe that but my heart is in a thousand pieces……..
So many times I have heard your children won’t stop until they want to…really won’t to. And the famous line……As soon as they hit rock bottom they will……Well, I think I am at my wits end…..or “ My Rock Bottom”
I look at our city and think, how did this epidemic of meth, ice get so bad? Why are they allowing this drug to take their lives, ruin their families and actually killing them day by day. This drugs has turned our life filled children into adults who aren’t looking at their future anymore. That alone breaks my heart. I wish they could see the life Jesus wants to give them, the peace they could have, the future that would knock their socks off. Through these seven years I have fell into depression because I can’t bandage them up or kiss it and make them better…….oh how does that hurt. It is so hard for me to understand how some drug can be that powerful and that controlling over someone to the point they don’t care about their family, what they look like, they don’t care too much about anything except getting high. I pray…….and there is a huge part of me that knows one day I will look back and see how far God has brought them. Until that day I have to hold on…..even when there looks like there is no relief in sight trust…..trust the Lord !